Instinct

Do you believe in instinct? Better question is do you know what is instinct??? Well, in my point of view instinct is when you have a VERY uneasy feeling before you do something, & you know something good or not good is going to happen. Well, I do believe in instinct & frankly, I really hate it when I have this uneasy feeling. Really make me miserable. However, now I am much better in handling this uneasy feeling. In a simpler word, I prepared myself so that whatever happen, the impact to my feeling is not too big.

I've blogged before about how everytime whenever I have a meeting with paul, I felt nervous, uneasy feeling etc,etc & I MUST have short visit to the loo. The level of this feeling is varies, sometimes it's mild & sometimes I really nervous that almost make me puke. What I tend to blog is I had a major uneasy feeling today (last week too) that happened exactly before I met paul. Again, the uneasy feeling was answered during the meeting. Yes, I need to do a big move related to my project. It's not a bad thing, that is the most important thing. Luckily my analysis before will not be thrown away. Instead, it becomes another discovery...huhu, sound scary ha? To achieve my main objective, I've to run another testing. It might takes time but fine with me. As usual paul always come with all brilliant suggestions, TQVM.

As usual also, paul made some remarks that make me feel happy & boost my motivation to continue the work. Well, what actually did he say? Hmm, he said he himself not believe that we've achieved until this stage. I know I made some progress since I started my PhD *ngeh3x* but still nothing to proud of. I feel small, incompetent compared to other friends but paul made me feel differently. In other words, he believes in me & I won't dissapoint him.

Before the meeting, I did some research on the next stage of my project. I got headache instantly & the good thing is, I got some ideas on how to do it. Simpler word..it's implementable. How hard it's gonna be? Too early to say but no pain no gain right? I've been through difficult situations before & I know I can do this again. Besides, what do you expect when are you doing PhD?

Starting from tomorrow I have THREE main tasks to do... What are they??
1. New rules of the control system
2. Real time control system (definetely will come with BIG headache)
3. My rig...huhu
Please god, please help me, please show me the way, please smooth my journey & and it's only YOU that I could for help, only YOU I could ask to fulfill my prayers...

**short note that not related to my PhD: Tonight episode of House is really(3x) amazing. Can't wait to know the ending next week but it will be the finale *sob3x*